Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
you inspire me to be a worse person
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
Randomize
