she was left over bi-product, like the hotdog of the human race
what day is it and did you see me today?
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
She was just trying to do dick voodoo. Pretty standard stuff.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I went to finger her and found a penny. I think ill keep it.
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