You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
She's the hottest girl I've ever seen before and didn't lose her virginity until she was 19. As men, I take it as failure on our part that hot 19 year old virgins still exist.
I had a dream she was puking on me, but sadly in real life she was puking on me too
Almost made out with Amanda but I told her "I'm in a committed fake lesbian relationship with Laura. I can't."
Buying weed with grant money. God I love college. No other time are we presented with these opportunities.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I spent the morning naked in her roommates closet because her parents decided to come over after church..
They were assless. I wore assless football pants.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
may or may not have entered into a gay civil rights discussion with 6 year olds. Hint: I did.
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
Randomize
