this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
Not sure if it is a new high or new low, but i left a basket on the porch of the sorority I woke up at. It had a description of the Minnie Mouse I woke up next to, and Plan B.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
IDK I WAS CAUGHT UP IN THE TEQUILA SHOTS AND FRIENDSHIP
You don't marry someone you don't want to fuck senseless this is 2014 dammit
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
If my vagina were a person, it just ran a marathon.
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
I’m going to Lewinsky this place
That makes no sense, but it sounds terrifying
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