I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
Just told the nurse I wouldn't get on the scale. Told her to write FAT.
I went from a chick that didn't like to have sex to one that can't get enough of it. I can't believe I'm going to say this but at 27 I think I need a happy medium
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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