I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
i woke up naked with 27 half ripped $ bills in my bed from ripping them off the wall of the bar
Am i fat?
Well i wouldnt let you on top
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
No, that was the night I was sneezing out barf
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
Definitely but only if you hit on the 16 year old in the karate class as part of your waffle and gin fueled sexually deprived rage.
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
Randomize
