whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
New rule: gentleman callers are required to bring me gifts of beer when coming over to court you. Tell the monster jam dudes so they know.
Some idiot from high school is in the hospital for bonging three beers up his ass
He should have died. Natural selection.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Every time I walk onto campus my Saint Patrick's day scar starts to throb. I'm like a drunken accident prone Harry Potter
I'm instituting a new rule. If you wake me up at 3am about wrinkled blankets, I get to throat punch you
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I told him I hooked up with his best friend. And then he ate me out. I'm just THAT GOOD.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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