BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
Also, hurry up because I don't like drinking alone. I'm still doing it, but I don't like it.
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I "liked" his changed relationship status just to show him I'm ok with the fact he found someone not as pretty as me
I've reached the last of the wine in my cup so now I have to sit up in my bed to get it through the crazy straw
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
