if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
It's pitch dark except for the glow sticks, someone turned the heat up as high as it would go and the bathroom is flooded. Also think I just stepped on someone's face.
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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