please pick me up with an explanation of why i shacked in a trailer with a guy who doesnt have a car.
There's an amish chick decked out in amish clothes on a cell phone staring at me.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Oh come on. There's no way I was the only female choir student taking shots in the back room.
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
Let’s try it, I’ve never had a bad time with sex, tacos and beer.
She's celebrating a tinder-match-aversary and I'm not about that.
Randomize
