Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
honey bunches of taint.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I'm just crazy horny about you
I panicked i brought burritos. Funeral burritos
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
Dry spell is over and now I’m drowning in a river of dick. The dam broke and now half the dicks in DC are trying get in my skirt
It’s a glorious dick miracle!
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