I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
They have a booking log online so i can just check that instead of call
Technology: making bailing your sister out easier since 2008
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
He is sitting on the foor in the soup aisle saying "to each their own soup"
Why do I have a separate credit card just for booze? Because I saved enough points so Saturday we are flying to Denver to smoke legal weed and fly back in the same day.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
He did a backflip because drugs
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