he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
did i walk over a car last night?
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
WHY ARE THERE SO MANY BURPS IN MY SMALL, INCREDIBLY ATTRACTIVE BODY
He's 5'2" and his dick 4'8"
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
