I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
So would u like to explain why you ate all my pickels and took my 1800?
About that, i have your 1800 on my desk with intentions of returning it but theres nothing i can do about the pickels
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
she peed on how many people?
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
We just left the shoe. An app card to Fridays. $25 to santoras and a note that said sorry we were drunk on the front doorstep of the strip club
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
So changing channels while she's on top is frowned upon. It's back to thinking about baseball again.
What?? I could've slept with an ordained minister!
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize
