why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
Dude, I just spun my iPhone on my boner without it falling off. I belong in cirque du soleil.
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
I was jumping over your garbage can screaming "Im a snow cat!!" ..Who wouldn't want to see that?
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
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