Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
how can you tell if its a queef or a fart from that close?
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
He def has a gf... But hes 7 feet tall and that superceeds any morality I may have.
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Are you coming to the bday night? i'll be doing a life-like reenactment of traveling through Bonnie's vaginal canal and taking my first breath of life. Don't think you'll want to miss it.
I can bring a slip n slide and curtains.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
Randomize
