just got my goo swallowed for the first time. colors seem so much more vivid now, and more rainbows are outside
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
Shaving your balls drunk sounds like a good idea untill you do it
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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