now i know why i became what i already was.
hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
You drank everything last night. It was like this huge deconstructed long island that went on for 5 hours
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
Thank god for makeup because it looks like someone took a shit on my face
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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