can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
I just read through our messages from yesterday and realized we both referred to me tearing my penis as a good thing. What the fuck.
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I told him that if he cleaned the bathroom, I'd blow him. You could eat off the toilet. Seriously, get over here. This is the cleanest you'll ever see it.
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
Oh dear God, they have a song about Mom...
I'm pretty sure that my eyebrow is going to be swollen from a sex injury tomorrow and possibly a black eye. If it forms that way it wiil be the second time. Different eyeball. Different decade.
I need your opinion, is it ACTUALLY sweet that a booty call offered to walk me home with an umbrella because it was raining, or is that just low standards?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
If I don't wake up tomorrow you inherit my paycheck and can only spend it at cinnabon
I woke up naked next to my hot manager. Left before she woke up, and worked an entire shift with her. She has no idea.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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