Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
new rule: i'm not touching his penis until he takes me out to dinner.
you know, if you actually abided by that rule there would be many more successful restauranteurs in ohio.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I kinda remember trying to staple rolls of toilet paper to make a pillow, but it's blank after that.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
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