I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
We hit a deer, sort of a buzz kill. But it's fine.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize