but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I almost punched the night nurse in her face. I woke up and she was standing over me.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
You went to jail last night?!
Just a little bit.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
You can't just walk around stealing hats from drunk boys and peeing in bathtubs. Turn down.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
