Dual....:-)
Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
i watch way too much csi for them to even pretend to be my friend.
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
he literaly had industrial grade plastic underneth his blankets
you were watching the nanny crying, saying I wish I was that thin eating twinkies. THAT DRUNK.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Woke up in a cemetery. Puked in front a funeral ceremony that was going on.
I touched a dick in church today
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
If you ever tell anyone I offered you boob squeezes for cheetos, I'll kill you
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
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