Another weekend, another 3 guys I have to awkwardly avoid while crossing campus...
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
It's 9:30am and I've already blown three loads. Reason #101 I love 25 year old girls.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
Blacking out is all I've done this year and we're only 3 days in. Checkmate bitch.
On the upside, no one went to the hospital! Lex's friend was definitely on fire at one point last night though because he tried to juggle tiki torches. He was shirtless this morning and smelled like a BBQ.
He kept saying "Welcome to Indianapolis" over and over while we were having sex...because that's his hometown. I was scared and confused... I didn't know if I should have said thank you or what.
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
Randomize