At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I drank half a bottle of wine while watching the Olympics opening ceremonies. I catcalled at handsome athletes. Stop me.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
do you think me going to the gyno dressed as a cat is inappropriate?
I woke up and my backpack was empty. He used me for sex, and back to school supplies.
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
The walk of shame was so much longer today. i have to start fucking guys in my own postcode.
Randomize
