I had so many friends before that round of Never Have I Ever.
you woke up and yelled "the tv is moving" and fell on the floor and passed back out
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
He says he won't get serious until he screws an Asian and a virgin. I should just place an ad on Craig's List
Wanted: female 18-24 of Asian or partial Asian descent to fuck my ginger boyfriend. Must be willing and able to fake virginity. No emotional connection needed, just sex, just once. Further contact post sex not needed (or particularly desired)
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I was drunk and really grossed out when you poured cheese on me and, I guess I just freaked out.
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
Wait I can't come yet Mr. Brightside is playing
ok i defs just took my shirt off in the middle of a frat party though so keep me updated
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
How high do u want to get? Just kind of high or yelling at swans high...
Swans
I think/hope James is drunk. He's standing in the front lawn loudly declaring "I AM a popsicle!" Over and over....
Randomize
