He had personality for days, but cock for only minutes
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
you said your puke was red because you were proud to be an american.
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
despite the cops showing up at 8am, pre gaming groundhog day was my idea yet. and by pre gaming, i of course mean getting black out drunk by 7:30am
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
I drunkenly transformed into shehulk last night and lifted every single guy off the ground bc one guy told me that there was no way I was strong enough. Don't worry, I proved them wrong. Stupid stereotypical men.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
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