I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
Hey man thanks for carrying me in and out of that frat house. There's no I in team.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
We peed together in a dark alley while holding hands. That is a bond that can never be broken.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
After all this I still can't spell gonorrhoea without autocorrect
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
Randomize
