I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
You lost to your mom AND grandma in beer pong last night. pretty sure that constitutes a retirement from the sport
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Randomize
