so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
that's almost as bad as that time i almost ashed in a baby carriage
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
he's 22 and listens to dad music. if i hear one more modest mouse song i'll never blow him again
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
We all just got ice cream, condoms, and toilet paper now were gonna go home and watch movies as a family.
Condoms?
I just talked with someone about real estate trends in Atlanta then got three blowjobs in a row. Boom.
never let me tell the bartender to cut me off, i basically told on myself
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
I don’t care how cute or big a guy is I’m done with drunken hand jobs. It was like I was pulling a nine inch bungee cord for 25 minutes. Now My arm and shoulder is dead
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
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