I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
We went to red robin and there was a 15 minute wait so we went and fucked in the car. Quickies, endless fries, and a mascot handing out balloons- this is literally the night of my dreams.
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
I bet, I woke up to you like naked at 4 in the morning shoving a sandwich in your face
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
