apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
I'm taking stock of m life as of right now and my Friday night plans are to drink a 30 rack by myself so I can have a tv stand when it is finished
thats because you have standards... and i have a thing for guys that give me free drugs.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
dude i'm so hungover my hair hurts
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
I just told the bartender to “give me something that will murder meâ€
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
I just threw up in front of a bunch of parents/prospective students while they were on a campus tour..awesome..
Randomize
