no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
I understand, but unless there is an intervention for me being planned, i DON NOT want to talk about my life choices
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Fuck twitter. Fuck men. Fuck bras. Fuck flip flops. Fuck makeup. Fuck perfume.
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
If it were up to me his wife would never get his penis again, but I guess they have some sort of arrangement
Yes, an arrangement called marriage
Randomize
