Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
will you please explain to me as to why or how i have a dirtbike tread looking bruise on my back?
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
So apparently blacked out me judges a man based on what type of dinosaur he would be...
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
you made out with another girl for some wings
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
