Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
he just fluffed my hair and told me I had to dance with him because we were both gingers.
Fly, little bird! Repopulate the ginger race!
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Randomize
