I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I justed realized that the word 'turd" is present in saturday
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
You just kept yelling "SATAN!" at me every time I walked by
before you smothered your pizza in mayo you blotted it with a napkin saying you were trying to watch your fat intake
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
Randomize
