Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
i just sent my parents are gone come over I have condoms to my mom because Derek changed my numbers while I was passed out
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
If you can't find your cat in the morning it's cause i put him in the laundry basket and then put the laundry basket in the shower.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
I'm sorry but the visual image of you suffocating on vagina is basically hysterical
I achieved the level of drunk I wanted even with the length of dress I was in..
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
Randomize