love makes seman taste better
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
We named our saturday intramural dodgeball team "we're hungover". Pretty much just an excuse to fuel my alcoholism on friday nights.
At one point I was double fisting both beer & ice cream. I love public events in this town.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Also, upon examining the photos, I have concluded that you were the sloppiest drunk girl of the night. And that's saying something considering Hurricane Jessica was in town.
There's a guy here who is improvising his own shadow dance on a table against the wall, in case you're wondering how my night is going
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
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