the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
There is NOTHING better than watching a child being chased by an ostrich.
I can't try on my wedding dress because someone is trying to commit suicide in the store. Is this a sign?
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I have green food coloring in my hair and just got a text from "Guy in the Yard"...so this morning is going just as you might imagine.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
