omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Yeah sorry about that. I got pulled into the Russian student society's end of term party. There was too much vodka and eurodance to come help you pack.
We found him. He was passed out in a McDonalds booth with at least 6 big Mac wrappers. The employee said he kept yelling that he was in America and had the freedom to have big macs. Fucking Italians...
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
Haha never eat brownies from a guy with batman pajamas
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
