Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Is a swingers hotel appropriate for an anniversary?
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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