Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
once my pubes got caught on her snaggletooth it was all downhill from there
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
she pinky promised me she was 18
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
i'm reaslly not drunk enough to wtch the fat lesbian on my floor brng another fat lesbian dressed up as a bloody nurse into her room at 2am
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
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