Cut to me doing the walk of shame to work from a hotel.
i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
I'm more concerned with the fact that he was UNconcerned that live poultry could peck him in the nutsack @ any moment of sex
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
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