week 6 of class: i have yet to go to spanish sober. i love being THAT girl.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
No, he attached a coozie to his crutches so he can carry his beer around the party.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
I tried to take home a cat on broadway last night. I named him Pinocchio and put my purse down on the sidewalk and tried to put it inside it
You had a fry stuck to your face... Every five mins you would wake up, take a bite, put it back then fall asleep again...
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
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