i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
I just made doing the dishes into a drinking game. crafty, or pathetic?
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
Had a vaginal orgasm. I feel like I made sex my bitch.
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