fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Things I love twice as much when drunk: Taco Bell. Office chairs that roll. Classes.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
he came in the room wearing gloves & rapping while eating a corndog
knight in shining armor
I'm imagining a seal in an ugly shirt hahahahaha Percocet
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Noo not in a booty call way, in a 'How are your abs and penis doing today?' sort of way.
You kept licking my face. You said you were making sure I was real.
Randomize
