Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
If it has a penis then it will be stupid. Just how it works.
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
as my niece was drinking milk out of a crown royal glass i realized i dont think i've ever bought a glass that didnt come with a bottle of liquor....
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
First drunken handjob: not successful. Second handjob, mostly sober: much better. Nightly news brought to you by me.
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
The only alcohol in the house was a bottle of Sherry. It's like cough syrup that I shotgunned off Strawberry Shortcake's ass.
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
The convent might be a nice break from real life
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
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