I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
We exchanged spring break stories last night. Open relationships are the best.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
He told me he loved me...but added "you crazy bitch" at the end. Does it still count???
Remember when I convinced you to watch me eat my sandwich just so you could reuse my plate and save us money on our water bill? I'm so ecofriendly when I'm high
Randomize