I wannas sexs uuuuu
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
yeah I'm sure your grandparents are the best but it's halloween. get a slutty costume and let's go ham.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I might as well walk around wearing a sandwich board and accept the fact that I'm dying single.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
MY HISTORY TEACHER IS FUCKING MY MOTHER. I am downstairs and i can hear the squeak of the bedsprings please I swear to god pick me up THIS INSTANT.
I think I’ve been affected by his dad mustache. I wanna ride it.
Randomize