Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
She blew me in the back of the cab while eye of the tiger was on the radio. Top five all time automatically
We are cuddling. She is so cute when she is too high to be a loud bitch.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
She sneezed like 10 times, put her head down on the table and then laid down on their couch and fell asleep. In the middle of the dominoes game. I'll never understand why my dad continues to provide my mom wine.
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
Let's just say it was like a porno version of Aladdin....
Listen. You dont know how advanced you are in yoga till you have to shave your butthole
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
